My kaku had been my role model since childhood...he was an ultimate bohemian....when he left home, i was hardly seven..all that i really remember now was that my thammi never spoke to anybody since then...i found everyone in a melancholic mood but the discussions faded away in a couple of months...along with thammi's last trip to Kashi Mitter's ghat....
Nobody's life changed after her demise, only Mishtu, the pet parrot shouted all day long from its cage pointing towards thammi's room......The poor thing hardly realised that her share of nokul dana was never to come again.
I slightly remember that it was an afternoon when i had asked my mother, "where did Thammi go?"....she was busy checking some exam papers and replied me in a haste that she went for a holiday....and i was stupid enough to believe that. Late at night i silently checked my steps and went to console Mishtu as i thought she was missing thammi and nobody realised that she was also sad....The fine line of difference was that she was not able to speak and we spoke a lot... There was a shiver which ran through my spines when i last saw Mishtu......she flew away....and i ran upstairs leaving the open cage in dark.....That very night i could not sleep......
Mishtu's disappearance hardly bothered anyone....except for Jethimoni, who kept on calling for her throughout the day......to my utter surprise, i did not feel guilty....
In my monotonous life, a silence often spoke to me.....when i saw the burning ambitions of my male cousins to bag an IIT or IIM degree and also the unbearable desperation of the female ones about getting married before their wrinkles are prominent.....i felt pathetic.
Being conventional was just not in my blood....and i was not very late to prove it....
We always love blaming other people for things which are the spastic brainchildren of our own selves.....so did i.....Pessimism was growing up in me fondling with each and every tender incidents.....It was a Bijoya dashami....when i gifted myself my first bottle of Beer.
It was not a big deal after i had opened it....only the bad part was that the whole thing was caught red handed. The mobile network had failed and dad had to come to the terrace and over there i was
gladly finishing my drink......A hard slap was strong enough to get rid of all the intoxication ( though i hardly had a bit of it)......but tears did not roll down this time....dad was clueless,furious and said to my mom that nobody other than his brother had dared to do this kind of a nonsense.......The other members of the family were either busy discussing about my horrible act(though it was none of their business) or they were happy that they had a new gossip for a few days.....Jethu just said in a low voice....History repeats itself.....and trust me, that very day i had realised....why kaku left home!~!!~
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